JUST WANNA BE LOVED BY DAD

Most of my childhood my dad was in jail. He came home when I was 13yrs old and we never formed the relatinship that father and child should have. I've alway's felt some kind of way about wanting my dad in my life. In my mind i've alway's had a fantasy about being able to have the kind of relatinship that father and daughter have{daddy's lil girl}. He tries sometimes, but I want he and I to have so much more. I love my dad and i've never hated him. Even though he came and went in and out of my life I alway's had much love for him. Even now I try to be with him as much as possible, but things never work out like I want. I want he and I to spend a whole day together, and just talk and laugh and do what girls do with there dad. I'm not bitter towards him, I just want him to really know how much I love him. I think that's why i've alway's been attracted to older men. It felt asthough they filled that void of not having my dad around. I've been in and out of love, at least I thought it was love... But I just want my dad to be my dad and be the man I need him to be for me. But maybe oneday soon i'll get to sit him down and tell him how I really feel. And in the end i'll have my daddy like I want him, with me when I want. Now I have a husband and I want my man and my dad to form a bond. I would really love for the two of them to hang out sometimes, but life is funny sometimes it just might happen. And I know my dad loves me I just want him to show me in the way's I want. And in order for him to know that I gotta tell him. It's gonna come soon and I really can't wait...